A Matter of Feeling (and perspective)

How do you feel

Every once in a while, it is good to gain new perspective. I used to do this pretty frequently when I lived in Orange County by going to see other bands – essentially cheating on Duran Duran when they weren’t looking – right?? Since moving up to the central coast, it is a bit more challenging, particularly in my small town. While I have definitely gone to see live music, they are typically unknown bands, and more often than not – the style they play is a little less rock and a little more folksy in nature. Not my favorite, but…when you’re desperate…

However, on Saturday night, I saw Rick Springfield. I think I might still be a little giddy from the evening! He played at Rava Winery in Paso Robles, which is a gorgeous setting. If you’re ever in Paso, it is worth the drive to go and taste there just for the peace and beauty alone. Known for their sparkling wines, Rava also hosts quite a few bands and artists each year, Rick being one of them. He was doing his “Stripped” show. (get your minds out of the gutter – he was fully clothed, told stories, and played without a backing band)

I bought these tickets not long after moving into the house, and couldn’t wait to see him once I realized just how small of a setting it would be (think ballroom rather than theater). On Saturday, our seats were about in the middle, and in fact – I’ve been much farther back with VIP seats for Duran Duran than I was that night with our regular “no frills” tickets. The venue is just that small, really.

Acquaintances smile

I have no real experience seeing Rick Springfield, but I had an angel on my shoulder that night. My dear friend Laurie, who was killed in a car accident several years ago, was a huge fan. She was easily as much of a Rick fan as I any of us are of Duran Duran. In fact, she was such a pillar in his fan community, that Rick sent a huge spray of flowers for her funeral. I have no doubt that Laurie was there with me that night, as I stood up with other (far more intense) Rick fans around me and sang the words to his music with him.

Speaking of those Rick fans – prior to the show, there were food trucks and tables to buy glasses and bottles of wine outside in their patio and garden before the show. As I walked around, I did some people watching. I overheard people talking about traveling from show to show on the tour, the VIP packages, and basically all of the same things we tend to chat about with one another before the DD shows. I saw fans greeting one another exclaiming how surprised they were to see each other, “I didn’t know you were coming to THIS show. How did you get here so fast?!?” I couldn’t help but smile, knowing that the basic “fan” stuff is pretty universal.

After we took our seats, two women sat down next to me on my left. They immediately apologized (in advance) for screaming or standing up and dancing. I replied that they didn’t need to say sorry, that I’d be doing it right along with them. We talked a little bit about being fans, and then I mentioned that I’m a huge Duran Duran fan and even write a blog about them. The woman next to me poked her friend and said “That’s her favorite band!”

Try to explain it

I laughed because we (Duranies) are EVERYWHERE. My husband, who had been watching this scene unfold, nearly rolled his eyeballs right out of his head. I could almost hear the “Good lord, I cannot take you anywhere without Duran Duran coming up in the conversation…”

He’s right. He can’t.

At that point, Rick took the stage. I have to admit that as excited as I was to see him, I really wasn’t sure what to expect. I know some of his music, but most of it is earlier – not the more recent stuff – and although I’ve read his autobiography, I just didn’t know what he’d be like on stage telling stories.

My fears were completely unfounded. He is fantastic live. Not only did I enjoy the entire set he played – the stories were what made the show. The reality is, Rick was my crush just before Duran Duran. I started watching General Hospital because he was on it. So seeing him live and in person in front of me was kind of like traveling back to my tween years. Awkward, kind of goofy, and pretty damn giddy. The only thing really missing was my friend Laurie. Just prior to the accident, we’d met for lunch with our other friends, and we’d agreed that the next time Rick toured – I’d go with her.

Nothing really gets them that high

This was not the first time he’d been in my area since that last lunch together, but it was really the first time I felt like I could be there and enjoy it without her. And…I did. That doesn’t mean I didn’t think about her as I sang “Jessie’s Girl” or stood and cheered during “Human Touch”, or my very favorite, “I’ve Done Everything for You”. It was hard not to, but rather than sadness, there was joy. Total joy, the way I know she would have wanted.

One of the things Laurie and I spoke about often before she died was that we were going to stop feeling bad about buying the concert tickets. Laurie wasn’t married and didn’t have children, but she still felt some of the same misgivings I did about being so thick in fandom at our age (which at the time, was right around 40). She was one of my very few friends outside of the DD community who really “got” it, and I remember that last lunch, she looked at me and said “You know, we have no idea how long we’ve got. You’ve got to just LIVE. Buy the tickets. We have to stop worrying about what other (assholes – Laurie had quite the mouth, even worse than my own!) think. Have fun, because who knows when our last time will really be.”

It was a matter of days before Laurie was gone. She wasn’t wrong that day and I’ve never forgotten what we talked about over margaritas that afternoon.

Emotion’s a game

It is hard for me to live up to her words at times. I do spend less time apologizing for being a fan, and more time rejoicing that I am a small part of this wonderful community of people. Although, I still let a lot of other things play on my mind, and guilt me out of taking risks that might make me happier in the long run. I’d say I was trying to find balance, but the reality is that I’m always worried about upsetting something or someone.

Perspective is good. Miss you, my friend.

-R

5 thoughts on “A Matter of Feeling (and perspective)”

  1. I can recall Rick Springfield yes he character was a Doctor on General Hospital Noah was his name. I never had a crush on Rick Springfield but he can rock Jessie’s Girl. My true crush John Taylor Duran Duran. I met a man at my office I was talking about the Las Vegas concert and he said you are a Duran Duran fan. I showed him pic, albumns cd’s posters and my VIP gifts Pat is his name he told me had a Duran Duran. It is a small world so many fans of Duran Duran they need to be in the Rock Hall of Fame. Lets rock with Duran Duran. Duranie thanks for your blog. I have been praying for a solemate he must be Roman Catholic and like Duran Duran music.

  2. Hello, Daily Duranie!

    Were you able to check out Simon Le Bon on Katy’s Kate via DD Fan Community (duranduranmusic.com) today? If so, what were Katy & Simon discussed? Was it about RRHOF ’19? Simon’s future projects & life changes?

    1. Hello Anonymous 🙂

      I am sorry that I didn’t get to the Kafe yesterday. In fact, yesterday was CRAZY at my house (someday I’ll write my own book about it. Right after our fandom book….:D), and I completely forgot to listen. Bad Rhonda.

      However, I did listen this morning, paid rapt attention, and took plenty of notes so that I could write up the highlights. I’ll tweet/post the link when it’s done, so please stay tuned! Thanks for the reminder! -R

      1. Hi R,

        Thank you for replying to my comments. I look forward to your tweet/post. BTW, Rick Springfield is still cool and he ages well! 👍 He doesn’t look old; he has great charisma!

        Best Regards,

        Anonymous

        1. Thanks for the reminder, Anonymous! I really did forget…

          Rick was so great – he is so charismatic, I think that format really worked for him. Thoroughly enjoyed the show. Having no expectations really helped, too. (but you’re right – he has aged extremely well!) He sat on a stool, drank a bit of wine and had fun. I loved it. He laughed at one point as he explained that all of the voices and other instrumentation we heard on the backing tracks were all him, so on some of the songs, “you’ll hear 17 of me!” I suppose for a real acoustic show there would just be him on the guitar – but I didn’t mind. He did do a few acoustic too. Others though, he used the backing and it sounded great. I don’t think this format would work for a lot of bands, but it was successful for him.

          Enjoy the blog today! -R

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