Are You Laughing at Me Now?

My biggest regret.  My other homework assignment…..

I have thought about this topic a lot lately. I know there’s some saying about not regretting crap because it gets you where you are today. I suppose that yes, that’s partially true, but sometimes we do or say things that we wish we could take back.  Those are still regrets, and I do have them…the question is which to include!

I could go for the obvious – I wish I’d gone to at least one of the shows in 1984. Yeah, I missed ’em, and I still blame my dad and his crazy rules for that, but I don’t know that it would have changed anything, and maybe, had I gone to that show – I would have had my “closure” and been over the band.

Yeah, right.

There has been many a moment when I say “Oh, wish I would have gone to _____ instead of ______”  We had a few of those on the last tour, and I’m sure we’ll have more on the next one.  It’s the way it goes, and Amanda and I are brilliant with our “choices”.

I could chose something a lot less obvious though, which is what I do think about most when this subject comes to mind.  I hope Amanda reads this…she will probably laugh.  Last year, in Biloxi, Amanda and I were in the front row, pretty close to the middle. It was the first time I’d ever been in the front row for an entire show, and I won’t lie – a lot of that show is STILL a blur when I think back.  Everything after the midsection of Planet Earth when John and Dom came to the front of center stage. I just remember grasping the rail with a white knuckle grip and then it all gets kind of gets fuzzy. There is one point of the show; however, that I remember with the minutest detail, and that is during White Lines.

We all know the drill – Simon sings, and then he goes to the drum riser and grabs a bottle of water.  This should have been my cue to run, duck or at least put up an umbrella, but I did not. I completely missed it because I was watching everything else on that stage. The next thing I know, I see Dom looking at us, and I realize that Simon is making his way down the stage…only to stop much shorter than normal, and spray water up over his own head (as opposed to out in the crowd). I was mortified, mainly at myself for not realizing what was coming, but also at Simon – because dang it -WHY must he do that?! The effect is really not that amazing for the audience, even if the lights work properly, I promise! Apparently the flabbergasted shock on my face as well as Amanda’s was pretty funny, because the rest of the band, who was indeed watching us, laughed. I laughed too, but I also looked at Nick, grimaced and jokingly ran my finger across my neck, assuming that he’d know what I meant (and I hoped he knew I didn’t really mean that) I laughed, but even as I laughed, I felt bad.

In all fairness, while I am pretty sure Amanda and I were still “baptized”, it could have been far, far worse. I don’t really know why Simon stopped where he did, or why he didn’t spit the water the way he normally does, but as I know – it’s all in good fun. I did laugh. So did Amanda…while we cursed. I just shouldn’t have reacted as I did because the fact is, I didn’t die. I didn’t get sick, and I still laugh about the whole thing. (ruefully) I remember blogging about it afterward and having some genius out there tell me that the bacteria count is far less than in other places or something, and I’m sure that I’ll get even more hate mail after describing the disrespect I displayed that evening here, which I do in fact, regret.  I can hardly wait!

The bottom line for me is that there are always going to be things I wish I could do over.  I suppose I wish that I could have been more lighthearted that night and less freaked out by the whole experience, and not just Simon’s spit sequence during White Lines, but the whole thing in general. I don’t think I’m really all that unique in that regard, but I think it’s important to acknowledge when something doesn’t go as planned, and then move on.

Next time, I’m bringing a spit shield, but I’m still going to laugh!


3 thoughts on “Are You Laughing at Me Now?”

  1. Thankfully, at the Verona, Italy gig last summer at the White Lines moment I was in the restroom, (not 'coz I felt sick for Simon's spit).
    Simon is Simon, you must take him as he is, like it or not.
    Wondering if Simon has become THIS Simon after years of superstardom? No, I think he has been crazy since day one.

  2. I know it bothers some, but I LIKE the water. He did get me sick once, though in 2001. He had a cold and I had my mouth open in a scream when a big fat drop landed on my tongue. Oh well. One case of the Lebonic plague didn't kill me.

  3. Most people get their sniffles from their kids or coworkers… but how many can say, “Oh, I caught this from Simon LeBon!” That makes a better story any day! =)

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