I’ve misplaced my future. Could I please borrow yours?

Hi everyone!  This past weekend has been the sort of whirlwind I try to avoid. Somehow since you last read one of my blogs, we have acquired or been adopted by a new feline…and I’ve become the chauffeur for the entire brood of teenagers we have in our family.

On Friday night, my husband and I were sitting watching some TV when all of the sudden he sees a kitty at our sliding glass door.  This kitty looked very much like our cat Sigmond (who died a few years ago).  So, I got up to investigate.  The cat is definitely a Maine Coon and has the biggest paws I’ve ever seen.  She looked a little thin so I brought her some food, and because I know we have a lot of coyotes in this area, I made the executive decision to bring her inside.  (Which we all know is the same as saying “If I cannot find your owners, you have now been adopted! Cheers!”)  So far, no owners can be found – in fact I have to find time this week to get the kitty to the vet to see if she’s been “fixed”. (made sterile for those who do not understand my vernacular!)  I’d also like a guesstimate on her age and how big they think she’ll get.  I’d guess though that she’s about a year old.  Very much still a kitten.  I wish I had my camera on me right now because at this very moment she is sitting behind the screen of my computer and attempting to get my fingers as I type.  It’s all good until blood is drawn…

Go ahead and say it – I know – I’m a big sucker.  We’ve had many a cat come up to the back window, but it’s because this one reminds me so much of my old one that I opened up that door!  Sucker.  *sigh*  So, we’re working on a name – honestly – we think we’ve settled on Sasquatch – because she truly is Bigfoot – but we’ll call her Sassy for short.  That is, assuming we’re right that she is in fact female. There’s a lot of fur and I have battle wounds to show that I dared attempt to try and decide if she’s male or female for myself.  I’ll just let the doctors decide for sure at this point.  We have two other cats as well, and as you might imagine, it’s been fun watching them decide who is in charge.  There’s been some hissing, but no fur has flown and with each passing day they are getting closer to one another as they walk around the house or lay down.  I give them a week and they’ll be playing.

If all of that isn’t enough, and for me it really kind of has been – we have family here from England.  My kids have two cousins here that they’ve never met, and they are teenagers, about the same age as all of the older kids in the family (my youngest truly IS the youngest).  Somehow, my peaceful week of writing and tranquility has been completely destroyed.  I was assigned chauffeuring duties as the ALL the kids take turns staying over at one another’s homes, and someone has to drive them to the amusement parks and places they’ll be going this week.  Guess who that is??  While I’m glad my kids are having fun, I am longing for the idea that I was going to get work done this week.

I think it all comes down to the point that planning is futile.  At least, it seems to be for me.  There are weeks when I might have a general idea of what’s going on. But I’m finding out when you have teenagers, those ideas can be blown to hell pretty quickly.  Sometimes I sit and think about the ideas I had of my future when I was 23 and right out of college.  I could not have been more wrong!

I really believed I would find a true career for myself. Something that didn’t necessarily involve strollers, diapers and laundry, for instance. I would have never expected to be a stay at home mom, and I definitely wasn’t anticipating that I would only work for a few years at a job I hated and then retire to be a mom.  I like being a mom, but there are times when I wonder and even long for the ability to have something that is solely mine.  I think that’s where the blogging and book writing come into play – and they work just fine until I get pulled in a thousand different directions to fill roles I never quite signed on for, like this week.  I didn’t realize that all of this extra stuff was part of the job.  But then of course, no matter the career, there probably things like that – stuff you didn’t know you’d have to do or put up with.  Somehow, those little things leak in, like a slow water leak, and then at some point you’d better figure out how to bail out the water, stop the leak, or you might drown.

All of this makes me wonder if the band actually planned much for themselves beyond wanting to be rock stars.  I mean, did their careers turn out to be what they thought?  As a fan – and I know I can’t be the only one – I sometimes wonder if they really knew what it would be like. I think that whole celebrity/rock star thing is something that can really be romanticized in ones mind, but in reality is probably a pain in the behind much of the time. After all, when it boils down, it’s still a job for them. I wonder if it ended up being what they’d imagined.  I really don’t know a lot about what it’s like behind the scenes on a day to day basis – and I’m not talking about the studio time (I’ve been in the studio when a band is writing, and I have to say – at least from my own experience – unless you’re the one writing and creating it can be the most boring process EVER).  I mean, can you imagine having to do promotion tours and things?  You’re handed a sheet in the morning with a schedule on it that you’ve had almost no say in, and you’re off to the races. Not sure I’d love that.  It’s not a surprise that we’ve had reports of grouchy band members from time to time. I highly, highly doubt that their lives are that wonderful and glamorous all the time – even if they ARE being driven in a limo from one appearance or meeting to the next.  I wonder if they expected all of that along with the hit records, playing for thousands of screaming fans, or even fans going through their garbage or waiting outside of where ever they are for hours at a time.

Sometimes, I would swear MY days are like that.  Well, not the limo part, or having fans go through my garbage (unless you count my youngest noticing that I’d attempted to throw some of her “treasured rock collection” away), but – I’ll be thinking the day is going to go one way, and my oldest comes downstairs. I can see the look in her eye before she even opens her mouth, I know I’m about to have my day “redesigned”.  It’s annoying, but it’s part of my job, along with all of the glamour of laundry, litter boxes, cooking, and school paperwork.  Oh, and writing and blogging.

I must go, as my car is waiting.  Well, waiting for me to put the key in and drive my kids around.

-R

2 thoughts on “I’ve misplaced my future. Could I please borrow yours?”

  1. I am with you… what happened to free time… I am working within 36 hour windows right now so that I don't end up 're-planning' my entire week 4 times based on kid, work, spouse, family event changes and desires…

    I definitely have to work at having any open/downtime and plan it in versus it happening naturally anymore…

  2. I planned for me an amazing future when I was 18. I was so excited at the very thought of ending my College and kicking off a new life with a job, with my studies at University. I fell into my coma just months later and … where is the future that I had planned?
    Luckily for me, I recovered and now I live for the day, I try to schedule my free time to make everyone around me happy: partner, mum, parents in law, cousins, my boss, my co-workers, the band, … it's not easy, but it seems finding some free time is getting a challenge.

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