I am way, way, way tardy with this blog today and I do apologize.
So, has anyone gone to any shows lately??? (I love the days when I can ask that with all seriousness!)
As many of my east coast friends have tweeted and posted about going to the shows, and I have seen several photos of Duran Duran members out and about, I have also seen a few comments regarding the first Capitol Theatre show in NYC. It sounded like a fantastic show, complete with all of the major hits, a brand new song, and even a song or two that perhaps some haven’t heard in a while. Not at all bad, and definitely more than many have had over the past few years, am I right?
But then we get to the end of the night, and…something is different. The band waves their goodbyes, they head off stage, and yes, the lights go up. (and perhaps out again. I’m fuzzy on those details from here in California) Fans cheer, because well…they’re expecting an encore. Several minutes go by, and yes, fans are continuing to cheer. This continues for what many say was twenty minutes. I’ve got to tell you, even I might have given up by then, especially if the house lights were on. Usually I assume that is the signal to go, especially if security is telling me to move on out. But these aren’t just any fans. Nope. They are Duranies….and they’re not leaving until the band comes out.
Eventually, the band does come out again, and they play Careless Memories along with Girls on Film (I am hoping I got the songs correct). All is well. The band did the encore, and despite having to wait a considerable while, the crowd cheered and everything is fine. Except that some fans weren’t very happy. They were confused, they were wondering why the band waited so long, and to many fans…it just looks bad. No one seems to know if it was technical difficulties as DDHQ said, or if it was just that the band was unprepared to actually do an encore. (which quite honestly sounds ridiculous to me. This band always does encores, don’t they???) So some fans take to social media.
This is the part that interests me. Quite frankly I don’t care about what the band was planning to do or not do. I’m thrilled that the fans stayed and cheered. I’m not going to bust anyone’s ass about whether or not the band should have come back out on the stage, because I don’t know what really happened. I only know three things:
- There was a long wait between the band leaving the stage and coming back out.
Dom Brown posted that he had never heard a crowd cheer so long or so hard for a band to do an encore.
Someone dared mention their disappointment and anger with the band on their Facebook page.
So #3 is the fascinating part to me, Ms. Studier-of-Fandom. Said fan mentioned their disappointment in a fairly catty way…and it wasn’t long until fans came out of the woodwork to tear the fan down and make her criticism no longer credible. Even DDHQ answered the fan directly, commenting that the band had technical difficulties and that it was disappointing to them that she only say negative things, especially since the band was experiencing the exact same situation as the crowd. That answer from DDHQ did absolutely nothing to salve the situation. Fans wanted this girl’s head.
Amanda and I discussed it at length this morning because it’s something she and I have noticed over the years. Hell hath no fury like a Duranie when s/he’s seeing her/his band be dissed, and if it’s another fan doing the dissing, they can expect to be flamed, flogged, and virtually destroyed. We’ve actually experienced this from time to time ourselves, so I suppose I write from experience here.
Was it really fair to annihilate that fan for stating her opinion? Was it really fair for DDHQ to bust her chops? Was it OK for fans to defend the band at all costs? Was it OK for this person to even mention her disappointment?
Probably not. Yes. It depends…and maybe. (and maybe not necessarily in that order. No hate mail please.)
What I do know is that there’s a way to give constructive criticism, and there’s a way to be negative. Sometimes I get it mixed up – as all of you know – but I do recognize there’s a way to soften words so that you’re better heard and understood by those around you. My dad used to tell me (constantly) “You catch more bees with honey than vinegar”. I hated that saying, which should surprise no one, I might add. I really don’t think it was this person’s criticism that was horrible – but the way she worded it immediately put her at odds with everyone, including DDHQ. So her point served no one, and she likely walked away thinking the entire fan community sucks…and sometimes, it really feels that way.
I guess the point I’m trying to make is that sometimes, fans have good points. I read the entire argument this morning, and despite her delivery – she did have a few good points, as did many others involved on the thread. We do pay a lot of money for shows, and I also say we’re all VERY spoiled. I don’t think it’s below the belt to voice a complaint if it’s warranted, but in the case of the delayed encore…I would venture to say that you know, it was the first damn show out of the gate. Who really KNOWS (besides the band) if they were planning an encore or not, and at this point, who really cares? They came out and did a damn good one. And in exchange?
That band heard those of you in the audience that night. LOUD AND CLEAR. They know the crowd wanted them; and hopefully they know that we’re all still on the same team.
Make no mistake, if the band “decides” not to do an encore at the Hollywood Bowl on October 1st, I’m second row middle alongside Amanda. We’re prepared to camp out if that’s what it takes to get that encore.