To think that just one week ago I was well on my way to Chicago to see a show…and to think that six months prior, I wasn’t quite sure when I would hear Simon sing live again. What a crazy damn year, huh?
Simon is a fellow Scorpio to me, and his birthday is in between my husband’s and mine. I never forget Simon’s birthday. (although truth be told I tend to forget what day of the week it is, or what the date is….one of the “benefits” of being a mom, I think.) For me, Simon has always been the one I’ve teased, whether that is by laughing my head off as he’s dancing to Skin Trade, making a “special note” of some of his clothing choices in the past, or groaning as I’ve heard some very awkward stories about the guy after shows over the years. Teasing Simon, at least on message boards and occasionally in this blog, comes as naturally to me as gushing over the band as a whole. I don’t ever do it with malice, and I would like to think that if Simon actually knew me, he’d tease right back, and I’d welcome the exchange.
After the past year, however, I see things a little differently. Just last year in my little birthday message to Mr. LeBon on this blog I commented that…well…I’ll just quote myself: “I also know that he is at the heart of Duran Duran. The band would definitely not be the same without him – in the same way that it wouldn’t be the same (and isn’t the same) without all original 5 members. Some will argue that certain members, such as Simon, can’t be replaced at all, and while I would wholeheartedly disagree (everyone can be replaced, but it would change everything about the band, and that’s really the point in question.), I wouldn’t want him to leave. I need to see him in front of the band, I enjoy watching him banter with John (those infamous JoSi moments!)…” Even after 30 years of being a fan, I can still be taught things, and one of those things is that this band could never continue without Simon. Individual members could still go on – but without that voice, without everything that is Simon, we’d have no Duran Duran. I stand fully corrected on that one, and to whatever powers that be, I promise that I’ve learned my life lesson. I can’t ever replace the people who have done so much to influence me in my life, whether we’re talking about friends, family, or the Simon’s of this world. I’ve mentioned many times how differently I see Simon now. It’s true. I saw a very small glimpse behind the big green curtain (Wizard of Oz reference of course), and while I am sure I’m not meant to reside back there permanently, I think it made me treasure my love for this band.
When I stood in the audience at the Valley Center show and the beginning chords of Before the Rain started to play, I didn’t dare look at Simon…or any of them really. I just couldn’t. It was an extremely emotional moment for me, and quite honestly, I wasn’t about to share that vulnerability with anyone. I couldn’t look up for most of the song, and when I did – it was Dom’s glance I met, and he winked. I very much doubt that Dom knew what was on my mind, but naturally any interaction is good interaction and one of the reasons I like being so close. All I knew that night was that I was so thankful to hear Simon sing again. Most of the audience hadn’t the first clue (Hell, I doubt they knew the names of the band members or the names of the songs beyond Rio and Hungry Like the Wolf…), but I certainly did, and so do the rest of you. We stand very, very lucky these days.
My life is far from perfect right now. Sometimes I’m closer to perfect than not – this is not one of those times, not by a landslide. However, there are these tiny moments when the world feels right again and I feel “normal”. I feel like the Rhonda I left behind long ago, before I became a wife and mom. I have no worries, no cares, and can live in the moment fully and completely. Some of those tiny microseconds are spent in front of the band, and I treasure each one of them because you never know when your last one might occur. Simon is at least partially responsible for those moments, and I don’t know how I’ll ever do without them when they end.
Happy Birthday Simon. I know I’m absolutely no one to you – you wouldn’t know me out of a crowd, but trust me when I say you’ve made all the difference in my life. Thank you…and those crazy karate dance moves of yours, too. (yes, I had to get one good “dig” in there…)
-R
beautiful 🙂
awww, Rhonda, you got me all choked up with that one! Like Kitty said, beautiful. Sue always used to say that she would keep going to see DD as long as they had “the voice”, that it was Simon that made them DD. I had stopped going when John left but she never did. Once again, she was wise beyond her years. – Michduran
That was heartfelt and simply gorgeous. If there was one post the band could ever read, I would wish it would be that one.
Your post speaks to exactly what I felt at certain moments of the Portland show. You have written some moving stuff here.
TG
Simon is the perfect popstar, but also seems to be a very decent, kind man. We all adore him.