I’m feeling pretty raw tonight. The last few weeks have been very tough and are finally getting to me. Tonight, on top of everything else, my computer seems to have caught a virus. Obviously, this is the last thing I wanted or needed to deal with. Ugh. I’m going to have to take it in and I hope that it not only doesn’t cost much but that everything that I have on that computer can be saved. Like most of you, I have a lot of Duran Duran related materials on my computer. One really significant folder that can be found on my computer has everything we have for the book. Yes, I do have a hard copy of a lot of it and, yes, I have saved the work in other spots. Nonetheless, I worry. We have a significant part of the book done and, frankly, I’m proud of what we have written. I really want to finish it as soon as we can in order for us to be able to share it with all of you and more. Of course, I am also proud of what I have accomplished as a teacher and as a community organizer. Yet, sometimes, I have received negative feedback for these things. I certainly have heard TONS of negative statements about teachers and have definitely heard negative statements about my political beliefs and activities. In the case of this blog and our upcoming book, I suspect that we will experience something similar. Many people have offered praise about the blog and I am hopeful that people will like the book. Yet, I know that some do not and will not like what we have done. It seems to me that in all of these situations, I have put myself out there. I’m vulnerable. This has opened me up in a way that can and has resulted in painful moments. Of course, I am sure that the band has felt this way many times as well.
Today, I heard a couple of snippets from some of the new songs featured on the physical release of AYNIN. Of course, as I listened to them, I was judging them. Obviously, this is usually how it works. Bands release music and people decide if they like it or not. Yet, because of how I’m feeling, I started to think about how scary it must be to be them. Like me, they receive praise but they also get a lot of criticism. The good seems to out weigh the bad for them as they keep going. I wonder if the negatives get to them, at times, though. I have to think that it does. While they put on a strong, positive face, do they struggle behind closed doors? How do they deal with the negative reactions? The negative statements? What kind of suggestions would they have to offer for someone in my shoes? What would they say to us when we release the book?
I would like to think that they would tell us to remain confident in our work and know that we did well. They should us that we should be proud of ourselves like they are proud of themselves.
-A
