It’s time for a gushy, starry-eyed, fan post.
Back when we first began writing blogs for Daily Duranie, Amanda and I swore we would not fill our pages with syrupy love letters to a band that was likely not even reading. We wanted to be taken seriously, even if we didn’t always take ourselves that seriously. That said, we do take the music seriously. We revere our own fandom, and the connections it potentially creates with others. The act of championing our the faith of fandom, empowering it, and treating it with the respect and kindness it deserves, might not have been an idea that immediately came to mind on that fateful day I sat down at my old kitchen table and started cranking out blogs, though. I like to think that Daily Duranie began as a sort of spark, and it’s evolved as time has worn on.
As I sit here, now at an actual desk in my bedroom instead of that old kitchen table, I see it all a little differently. Kindness doesn’t just mean “kind” for everyone else, it means being kind to me, too. It means admitting my own fandom and being proud of it. Just like any of you, I can get downright giddy about things at times. It means sometimes being overly exuberant about things like a new album, an interview…news of a single to come, or a handwritten note from my (yes!) favorite guitarist on the planet.
Like many of you, at least I hope, I saw Dom’s post that he had a new album with signed copies available. Like the supportive fan I am, I didn’t waste time as I ordered my copy. The excruciating wait for overseas mail is, well, not fun…but I waited. Occasionally I’d see someone mention getting their copy, and they were all thrilled that Dom took the time to write a little message on a post-it note as well as sign the CD itself. He’s actually done that before, and I think it’s a super nice touch. I can’t imagine how many of these he’s had to sign and write notes for, and I’m glad it’s him and not me! Still, I waited, and then last Saturday I trudged up our ridiculously long and steep driveway to get our mail. (Have I posted a picture of our driveway? I should do that…and I occasionally do still kick myself for agreeing to buy a house in the hills!) I was generously rewarded as I opened the mailbox and saw that there was a padded envelope waiting!
A couple of things made me chuckle as I walked back down to the house – the first being that Dom mailed the package himself (he needs an intern!), and the second being he mailed the package on my 26th wedding anniversary. As I opened the package, I saw that yes, he wrote me a quick note on the same sort of pink post-it that others received. I mean, how cool is that? When’s the last time you received a handwritten note from any other member of Duran Duran?
(“Ah, never” says the writer…)
Sure, there was that audio note from Roger (that I still have open on my desktop…and at the ready to play at a second’s notice!)… but this is different. I don’t think I’ve spoken more than a sentence with Roger, but I’ve talked to Dom before. It’s nice to get a note. I’m sure I was glowing. I mean, I am sure I am still glowing. My husband sure noticed. (no additional comments needed, am I right?)
Was I giddy? You bet. I’d love to say I didn’t grin wildly, but of course I did. I’m human!! The idea of getting new music from anyone right now is something to cheer about, but from Dom? Complete with a signed CD and handwritten note? Oh heck yeah. I can’t even pretend it’s no big deal. It was probably the best thing I’ve found in my mail delivery for a very long time!
Here’s the thing: I AM A FAN. I’m also Rhonda, Daily Duranie, a student, a clarinet player, a musician, a gemologist, a mom, a female, and a person. Denying that I’m a fan is like denying part of myself exists. I can’t do that anymore, even if it means looking less-cool, and maybe even a little more crazy to some people out there. I know exactly who I am, and what (and whom) I love most in this world. Sure, I proclaim it a little more loudly than most. I probably missed my calling somewhere…or maybe not. Maybe this is exactly what I was meant to do.
Music is a constant in my life, one way or another. Whether I’m playing, or in the audience…or watching from afar on YouTube, I love music. I also have deep respect, admiration and love, for the people who write, record and play the music I love most. Not only am I not crazy, I’m also not looking to jump into bed with anyone. That shouldn’t be so difficult to understand.
Let me see if I can put this in terms most people can understand. If I wanted “the ultimate autograph” and actually got it…what would be left? An awkward morning? What about after that? How weird would it be to continue going to shows? Maybe people stop after that, which tells me right there it was never about the music. For me, it is about more than the music. After forty years of being a fan, and ten years of blogging? I’m going to basically give all of that up in exchange for one single night, or more likely, a couple of stupid hours?? Are you nuts???
Yeah, it’d take a whole lot more than that, at least for this fan. Not only do I have more respect for myself than that, I have more respect for fandom, and for the people I admire. Even so, I have my giddy moments, complete with grins, blushing, and joy. I hope you do too.
As I type, I’m listening to In My Bones again. Go get your copy!